Our love blueprint plays a huge role in how we emote, our interactions with people in and out of our interpersonal relationships and how we are in our romantic relationships. Your love blueprint is a reflection of your childhood, your relationship with your caregivers/parents growing up, how you adapted to your environment and faced the challenges life threw at you at your young age. 

As some would say, your relationship with your parents is the foundation for every other relationship you have. This is very true when it comes to one’s love blueprint. They were your first contact to love, care, vulnerability, safety and more. There are two types of Love Blueprint; a healthy love blueprint and an unhealthy one.

Those with a healthy love blueprint find it okay to be vulnerable in their relationships. There’s no co-dependency, self-love is present, authenticity is present, there is trust, acceptance and secure attachment style. For an unhealthy love blueprint, you don’t feel safe enough to be vulnerable, there are emotional addictions like fear, rejection, anxiety, impulsivity. Unhealthy attachment styles like people-pleasing, avoidant and hating conflicts. There is the push and pull dynamic, lack of boundaries, lack of emotional depth and there are a lot of highs and lows when in a relationship with an unhealthy love blueprint, basically riding an emotional rollercoaster. One’s past trauma reflects negatively in an unhealthy love blueprint.

So the question is, are you in love or are you in trauma?. How to go from an unhealthy love blueprint to a healthy one is by doing your inner work. Addressing and confronting your past traumas and things you suppressed as a child. Going to therapy, becoming more self-aware, particularly how to express your emotions and communicate your feeling as well as how you exist in your interpersonal relationships and your romantic relationships.

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